Reflections upon my project so far...

So deep is my sleep and so light is my wake that it as if each night I die and am reborn. It is as if no time passes whether I dream something I remember or not, I fall asleep at a point then wake up at the same point yet time has passed. What is this?

Finally I realise why I cannot sleep so easily, when the light is off or dim and everything is quiet my brain is left with nothing to concentrate on but my own thoughts. I think in depth and with great detail and precise clarity at these times yet during the day most interactions and thoughts are fogged. When I have some background imagery and quiet sound my brain can go blank and just go along with what is being presented to me, and in that blank state I lose all focus and sleep.

I am a bad salesman, it isn't something I enjoy or excel at, however I am great at taking orders and doing what is asked of me. I can edit and retouch images creatively and imaginatively.

I think my imagination and my thinking are two very different things. I can be imaging something and thinking about something else entirely, perfectly succinctly at the same time. For example while I am thinking all that I am writing I am imaging a fictional conversation between characters in a book I read.
During the day I am too tired and worn out to resolve anything.

Subconsciously in my head I like to put things in pairs and or imagine them symmetrically.


Disrupted Nature
I want to show how natural areas are broken up by what is Surrey civilisation now, I want the images to speak for themselves. Areas between isolation and remoteness and town/housing estate borders, there is no remote isolation. I would like to shoot some mundane landscape images on 5×4, to show the detail and altered natural beauty in each frame. I also want to experiment with film and the breaking/altering of what is unique by using my Zeiss Ikon Nettar 120 camera to drag the film and wind it to odd places and let accidents happen. I would like to shoot some self portraits in the mirror, with various cameras, not looking through the viewfinder, to document my reactions to the experiences I have while shooting for this project.

I would like to do large prints to show off all the details in the pictures

PERMANENCE - SKYLINE - HORIZON - WATER - SKY
People merely scratch upon the surface. Ownership is merely a mental state, an idea that something belongs to an individual or organisation. Everything, everywhere and everyone around us is all superficial and temporary. The difference between humans and animals is that we believe we are more than them. More being thoughts, ideas, possessions, memories. The everyday changes, nothing is the same and everything is all.

"We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion"
Top marks if you know where that quote is from.